February 2021

Mayoral candidate Christopher Dahl unloads boatload of Rush Limbaugh death memes in an effort to gain attention

After a leading candidate for Chattanooga Mayor was spotted sharing a post supposedly celebrating the death of conservative radio host Rush Limbaugh, Libertarian candidate Christopher Dahl took to social media to unload a collection of pro-death Limbaugh memes in hopes to snag some attention.

Experts believe Mr. Dahl hopes to gain some publicity with a copycat scandal that earned even more press for a leading candidate while those outside the top four have failed to gain any sort of noterity.

“He was spotted posting a “We have God-given free will to smoke cigars while denying lung cancer existed and then dying and going straight to hell” quote with a golden microphone floating in a lake of fire meme,” exclaimed a local Facebook police officer Donnie Covey. ‘This is shameful and I will contact the Chattanoogan at once.”

“I don’t know who he was but I’m still not going to vote for him,” explained Chattanooga voter Gary Plummer. “Posting a meme saying Mr. Limbaugh died choking on a fart covered cigar is the last straw for me.”

Marjorie Taylor Greene named the new leader of the Yellow Deli and Twelve Tribes after the founder dies

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After the death of the original leader from the Twelve Tribes, a cult that operates downtown Chattanooga’s Yellow Deli restaurant, a representative from the group announced they have found a suitable replacement in Georgia Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene.

Greene, a freshman U.S. representative from Georgia’s 14th congressional district, has made recent headlines for her wack-job beliefs in the far right conspiracy theory group or cult called “QAnon”, which many are saying puts her in a perfect position to lead the Twelve Tribes group.

“The first order of business is to rename ourselves the Thirteen Tribes because rightful President Donald J Trump should be his own tribe,” explained Greene to a group of high supporters. “Make that 14 when Q arrives”.

Experts believe Greenes will get right to work putting her own touch on the Yellow Deli menu. Sources say patrons, which are now called “patriotons” of the restaurant can look forward to new menu items such as the “Q-euben” and the “Jewish Space Sandwich” to enjoy.