A small but loud group of fans of the University of Alabama’s football team are trying to “stop the steal” by disputing the University of Tennessee’s win last Saturday.
“Don’t believe the lamestream media, sheeple, it just doesn’t add up,” said Curt Mibinit, a skeptical Crimson Tide fan. “I am certain that someone from the Deep State was bumping up the points for the Vols on the scoreboard, right under our noses, when nobody was looking.”
“I simply refuse to concede that the Vols won on Saturday,” said Kendra Prashicord, an Alabama fan. “I heard from a friend of a friend that at least three of the referees have been on Epstein’s jet and are blood-drinking reptilian shape-shifters, so it’s all rigged. Why aren’t we investigating that? I’m just asking questions.”
On the other hand, a small faction of skeptical University of Tennessee fans are also disputing the widely accepted outcome of the game.
“The Vols won, absolutely, but by a much larger margin than 24 to 17,” said Vols fan Micah Chatlate. “Also, there were way more people in attendance than the alleged 101,915 capacity of Neyland Stadium. Like twice that number, at least. Huuuge crowds. The biggest crowds ever.”
“And what kind of name is Crimson Tide?” said Chatlate. “Sounds like the name of a women’s beach volleyball team whose periods have all synchronized on game day.”
