Rep. Chuck Fleischmann

Fleischmann to endorse Mayfield Dairy products

Rep. Chuck Fleischmann
Rep. Chuck Fleischmann

After Scottie Mayfield endorsed 3rd District Congressional Representative Chuck Fleischmann this morning for the upcoming election, despite being rivals in the 2012 election, Fleischmann returned the favor by formally endorsing Mayfield Dairy products.

“Everyone knows that quid pro quo arrangements are how anything gets done in politics,” said Fleischmann, wearing a sweater bearing the Mayfield Dairy Farms logo. “You scratch my back, and I’ll scratch yours.”

“There’s nothing like starting the day with a tall glass of delicious, ice cold Mayfield milk,” said Fleischmann. “Look for the yellow jug, which guarantees freshness and quality by blocking harmful light rays.”

“Who can resist a bowl of Mayfield ice cream on a hot summer day? Mmm, mmm,” said Fleischmann, while rubbing his stomach in a circular motion. “My favorite flavor is Butter Pecan, and with all-natural flavors, it’s the classic taste that you grew up with.”

“Sure, you might be thinking that I don’t know a lot about dairy farming, and you’d be right,” said Fleischmann. “Well, Scottie didn’t exactly know a lot about politics, so it’s a fair trade.”

Francis Porkloin is a reporter for today, for you, for me, for us, for our children, for our children's children, and for our children's children's grandparents - which is us, again. Francis Porkloin is devoted to giving a voice to all people, including those who do not have mouths or have had them wired shut and can only make incomprehensible "Mmmrph! Mmmrph!" sounds. Francis Porkloin is committed to delivering the unbiased truth and telling the stories that others have no interest in telling - and that the public has no interest in hearing. Francis Porkloin is a Sagittarius.

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