Outgoing Mayor Ron Littlefield, who was not in attendance at the public forum

Mystery man Don Bigfield chides Mayor-Elect Andy Berke at public forum

Outgoing Mayor Ron Littlefield, who was not in attendance at the public forum
Outgoing Mayor Ron Littlefield, who was not in attendance at the public forum

At a public forum hosted by Mayor-Elect and former 10th District State Senator Andy Berke regarding issues including economic development, public safety and education, a mysterious man by the name of Don Bigfield spouted harsh criticism for Berke, well before Berke’s inauguration date of April 15.

Five minutes into the forum, Bigfield, who wore a wig with long, black dreadlocks and over-sized Harry Potter-style glasses, blurted out, “So far, I haven’t heard one word about property taxes and storm water fees. How are you going to ensure that they aren’t too low?”

Holding a fingerstache to his upper lip, Bigfield loudly asked, “Why have you not developed a plan to establish an official Ron Littlefield Day yet?” referring to Chattanooga’s current mayor, who was not in attendance.

“Now there’s a good man,” Bigfield continued. “He sent me a Christmas card.”

After commenting that Chattanooga’s top priority is establishing a centralized resource center for homeless people, Bigfield pointed at Berke and said, with spittle flying from his lips, “You better get your act together, or people will try to recall you.”

Bigfield then pulled his cape over his face, threw a smoke bomb onto the ground, and disappeared.

Francis Porkloin is a reporter for today, for you, for me, for us, for our children, for our children's children, and for our children's children's grandparents - which is us, again. Francis Porkloin is devoted to giving a voice to all people, including those who do not have mouths or have had them wired shut and can only make incomprehensible "Mmmrph! Mmmrph!" sounds. Francis Porkloin is committed to delivering the unbiased truth and telling the stories that others have no interest in telling - and that the public has no interest in hearing. Francis Porkloin is a Sagittarius.

Previous Story

Amazon, Chattanooga State to make city hub of expertise for “Walking Around and Picking Up Stuff”

Next Story

Sofa King Juicy Burger inspires other edgy restaurants

Latest from Politics